The First Laugh

"We laugh and laugh, and nothing can ever be sad, no one can be lost, or dead, or far away: 

right now we are here, and nothing can mar our perfection, or steal the joy of this perfect moment." 

— Audrey Niffenegger

Sky and I haven't laughed much this past year.

Sure, there's been plenty of smiles and giggles at something funny Millie has done, the kinds of things that you want to rush to tell someone and end up trailing off with "you just had to be there, I guess...". We have flipped on the television and snickered at our favorite shows, the pixels flashing bright on the screen, our arms or legs overlapping but not feeling connected. We have found joy in small moments, but always apart from each other. We haven't been able to look each other in the eyes when we were happy. I had forgotten how.

But late last night, after his bags were packed to help with the flooding in Illinois, he laid down in our bed smelling like soap and wet hair. I put my hand on his back and felt his skin. We talked for a minute, and then,  it somehow rolled into laughter- uncontrollable, pure laughter. He began laughing how he does at any good joke, with tears pooling at the corners of his eyes, and he wiped them away while new ones formed. And I began laughing at his hysteria. And soon, I couldn't tell you why we were laughing. I only knew that it felt amazing. I only knew that it was just us two, and we shared a moment I have longed to experience for months. It felt like we were away from everything bad in the world, and it was a moment of rest and joy.

So, that's why I picked this song for today's linkup with Goodnight Moon. Because life often gets in the way of things that are the most important. Things like laughing. Because at the end of the world, or just what feels like the end, these moments are what matter. It mattered more than I could ever explain to you.

*apologies again for another YouTube video...playlist.com doesn't seem to like my song choices...

"All I Need" by Mat Kearney

Here it comes it's all blowing in tonight
I woke up this morning to a blood red sky
They're burning on the bridge turning off the lights
We're on the run I can see it in your eyes
If nothing is safe then I don't understand
You call me your boy but I'm trying to be the man
One more day and it's all slipping with the sand
You touch my lips and grab the back of my hand
The back of my hand
Guess we both know we're in over our heads
We got nowhere to go and no home that's left
The water is rising on a river turning red
It all might be OK or we might be dead
If everything we've got is slipping away
I meant what I said when I said until my dying day
I'm holding on to you, holding on to me
Maybe it's all gone black but you're all I see
You're all I see

The walls are shaking, I hear them sound the alarm
Glass is breaking so don't let go of my arm
Grab your bags and a picture of where we met
All that we'll leave behind and all that's left
If everything we've got is blowing away
We've got a rock and a rock till our dying day
I'm holding on to you, holding on to me
Maybe it's all we got but it's all I need
You're all I need

And if all we've got, is what no one can break,
I know I love you, if that's all we can take,
the tears are coming down, they're mixing with the rain,
I know I love you, if that's all we can take.

A pool is running for miles on the concrete ground
We're eight feet deep and the rain is still coming down
The TV's playing it all out of town
We're grabbing at the fray for something that won't drown