January 4, 2013

Embrace the Suck or Bust?


His got his hair cut, his bags were packed, and now Sky is gone. He shipped off to his Army AIT (advanced individual training). This absence is going to take some getting used to, because while I can't list dates, I can safely say he won't be back tomorrow. I'm sure this blog of mine will soon record all my thoughts about it, but I'm saving those for the moment because I have other writers about to take the wheel. To help both myself and others in similar situations, I asked a few fellow bloggers to write about the ways they handle everything at home while their spouse is away. These ladies were separated from their husbands for various lengths of time and for various reasons, but have a common bond in their experience of getting through it. I'm honored that they are my guests during the next week's series, named When He's Away, starting Monday.

I planned on calling this special series "Embrace the Suck". (An explanation of the phrase "embrace the suck" for those who are unfamiliar with it- basically, it means that this situation (fill in the blank with anything) sucks, but that's the way it is. Embrace it. Deal with it. Get over it. It's a military way of simply saying, "Yeah, it's not fun, so what? Put on your big girl pants.") I made a little graphic, labeled all the posts with it, and was ready to go. But after I did, I felt a little convicted. It just wasn't sitting right with me.

Once I thought about it, I realized that I didn't want that to be the focus of this week, or this time Sky is gone. I'm sure I'll have plenty of embracing the suck moments, but this overall time needs to be about more than just enduring. I'll be full time in school again, and it will be interesting to couple that with being the only one taking care of Millie and getting more and more pregnant. But I'm trying to sop looking at it as, "This is so hard, and I need to brace myself" and instead start thinking, "This is a lot- however, not only did all my guest bloggers get through similar or much harder things, but it's an opportunity for me to do well and trust God."

So, yes. Millie and I will doubtless spend some days in our pajamas. We will eat macaroni and cheese more than I care to imagine. If those things happen because I'm busy with school and taking care of her, it's okay. I don't want to look back on these days as something I struggled through every second, but as a challenge that I beat. 

That's my goal- sad days, rough moments, and extreme exhaustion are likely to occur at some points of this journey- but the two of us will be just fine. And it's my hope that, if you ever find yourself in a similar circumstance due to the military or any other kind of separation, my guest bloggers may help inspire you to know you will be just fine, too.

3 kind comments from you:

Erinn C.D. said...

You'll do great! It'll be sucky some days but that's life and like you said, it's okay :)

greaterexp said...

One of the benefits of having lived a long time and/or of having been through tough times is that we have experience with getting through it and getting to the other side of it. You show good sense and courage by "girding your loins," so to speak, and starting off with the knowledge that tough times are inevitable; they may come at unexpected times, but they aren't really unexpected. You've set your determination to get through them with as much grace as possible and look forward to being on the other side of them. You're looking at it with expectations of good things happening, too. I think that helps a lot when we're facing something potentially tough. I'm no Pollyanna, but it just makes good sense to look for positives. Way to go! You're a wonderful woman! It takes maturity and character to find the good when the negatives are always so obvious. It's there. You all are in our prayers always.

Chantal said...

You'll do awesome! The first days suck but it gets better.

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