April 22, 2013

Name of the Game

"And when I lifted my eyes to your name, 
suddenly your heart showed me my way" 

There is something about giving someone a name. Many of us never get the privilege, and those who do only get it a few times. How humbling is it to be handed a living, breathing soul, knowing what they will be called is solely up the two people in the room who love that soul the most?

I want this baby to have a name right away- not the next day or next week. I want to see that face and know immediately, "Yes. This is you." The thought of a nameless little love looking up at me, just waiting, doesn't feel right. It's okay for a puppy to wander around without a name, but I need to know who I'm holding in my arms as soon as the doctor places them there. Besides, an old high school classmate just waited a few days to name their son- just announcing him as "the baby"- and when they did pick a name, I was let down. After all, when it takes that long, I sort of expected something dramatic like "Supercalifragilistic". (It was James.)

This journey of naming our baby has officially reached ridiculous. It was easy with Millie; we flipped through the baby name book, came up with a short list, and picked Amelia by the time we found out she was a girl at 18 weeks along. Her middle name is Sky's mother's middle name. Easy. And I can't picture her as anything other than a Millie. She just is.

It would be easier to tell you what I haven't done to find a name this time around. I have texted Sky with ideas on a weekly basis since he's been gone. I've asked 500 questions on Twitter, as all of you who follow me know. I researched every name on our list in every combination, pouring over old genealogy records from England in 1790. I have stayed up late, putting names onto birth announcement templates, contemplating how they look. I've verified that every name we're considering is at least 200 years old. I posted countless questions and polls on baby name boards. I even wrote a "baby name expert"- yes, really. I didn't know they existed until a few weeks ago.

We do have a name picked if it's a boy. It was easy, too. But if it's a girl, I'm starting to wonder what will happen.

Everyone keeps reassuring me that this baby will have a name. And I believe them.

Most of the time.

11 kind comments from you:

Taylor @ DearOlympia.com said...

It was really hard for us too. I picked out a boy's name but could not settle on a girl's name. Finally I just had Nate pick his favorite.

Chantal said...

Yep, the baby will have a name, eventually. We went to the hospital with two names, pretty certain on one, but then decided she didn't look like that. So we pulled out our long list AGAIN, tried every name... and ended up with name #2 that we went with! And it fits. As you know. ;)

You'll come up with it soon. It'll happen!

applesandglue said...

I think it must be hard to name your child, but also kind of fun. And ha, I am sure that you will have a name for your child eventually. And it will be absolutely perfect (paraphrasing the book Chrysanthemum). :)

greaterexp said...

The choice is obvious: Pablo Naruda.
Or you could allow the child to name itself when he/she turns three. I had a great aunt who was allowed at that age to name herself Mabel Elvira. Pablo Naruda doesn't sound so bad, does it?

Jessica Lynn said...

I was honestly terrified the scans were wrong and I was having a boy instead of a girl, because I wouldn't know what we'd call him. Heh...I may have asked if she was a girl before I asked if she was healthy and how many fingers and toes she had. Naming is such a radically important decision, but, as you know with your first child...it'll feel right when you figure it out!!

Anonymous said...

Em's name was super easy too. And this time we had a boy name picked and zero girls names. Then when we found out she is a girl I wrote down my favorite names which were Eleanor, Cora, Claire, and Elizabeth. The MR only liked Claire. Then he made a list and his number one pick, he wouldn't stop talking about, is now her first name. Which you already know because of FB and Claire is her middle. It's hard, and I think finding something you both love and agree on is even harder. I can't wait to know what your little one is and what great name you pick.

Fran said...

It will happen soon, you can always name it after me if it's a girl :P

Nicole Marie said...

I completely agree about wanting a name before they are born. I am (embarrassingly) looking for names now and I am still taking birth control... I get it. Haha. Good luck on the search. It will come to you. I assure you ;)

Brittany Sommer said...

Ah he/she will totally have a name and everything will be ok! Ryan and I were ridiculous and HAD TO have our names by the time we had our gender ultrasound but we are really one in a million because so many people cannot for the life of them figure out what to call their little miracles!

Michelle said...

Hahaha, James really is a boring name. And that's my husband's name! I could never name my kid something that common, and I know you agree ;)

I can't imagine how hard it is to pick a name. James and I talk about it already, and we are all over the board. No way could I make a decision if I had to!

Erinn C.D. said...

I just want to know so badly what the name's are! But I also want to be surprised so don't tell me!
I can't remember if I told you about the website nymbler.com or not but it's a fun one for find a name.
I think you should take as much time to name the baby as you both need. Their name will come to you :)

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