February 15, 2012
It's Okay to Need Roses
Valentine's Day has come and gone. More than once that day, I read about how girls didn't need anything special because their guy is so great. And while I appreciate the sentiment, I couldn't exactly feel the same way. While I have a great husband, the truth is, I did need something.
There are two reasons for it. Several months ago, Sky and I took quick online tests to find out our "love languages". The phrase sounds pretty cheesy to me, but the tests were interesting. Sky scored the highest in Quality Time and Physical Touch. And what I needed most? Acts of Service, followed by Receiving Gifts. When I first thought about that score, I disagreed a little- someone doesn't need to spend piles of cash for me to feel loved! But a gift doesn't have to cost anything. A handwritten letter would mean just as much. It's not that I'm materialistic- it just happens to be one of the ways I feel love. Hanging out with Sky and cuddling on the couch makes him feel loved. When he helps with chores or surprises me with a package of Junior Mints, I feel loved.
The other reason I needed something? To be honest, it's because of the relationship Sky and I have now. After all we've been though, I'm not the quite the same girl he married. The hits my heart took during everything that happened changed me, and this new girl needs more affirmation. I need the reminders that he loves me. It's not that I think he doesn't- he goes to work to provide for me and for Millie, and he's sweet. It's also not that I beg him for constant reassurance. But when I happen get that reassurance, my heart softens a little each time.
I figured he wouldn't even realize it was Valentine's Day. He ended up buying himself the gift I had planned for him. He doesn't like strawberries or chocolate, so that was out. It seemed like the day was going to feel like a disappointment, and when I opened my eyes that morning, I was hoping it would go quickly by. When I opened the bedroom door, though, Sky was dressing Millie in her snowsuit and heading out the door. I heard Millie announce "WOWERS!" (flowers) when they walked back in, and she handed me a beautiful red rose. Sky followed her with a whole vase of them and a kiss for me. He had ordered them days before and just ran to pick them up at the florist.
One rose would have done the work of all of them. But what I'm most thankful for is that he knows me. He knows that a girl like me does need Valentine's Day, and that I do need that one extra reminder of his love. I'm okay with needing it. And I married the right guy, because he knows I do.
And as it turned out, I had a perfect Valentine's Day.