February 16, 2012

Love Languages

I mentioned the "Love Languages test" in my Valentine's Day post. Have you taken the test before, or read The 5 Love Languages book? What did you think of the results?

When Sky and I did our assessments, this are the scores we got:

Mine is:

7 Words of Affirmation

2 Quality Time
8 Receiving Gifts
12 Acts of Service
1 Physical Touch

Sky's is:


7 Words of Affirmation
9 Quality Time
0 Receiving Gifts 
5 Acts of Service
9 Physical Touch

In a lot of ways, we're really opposites. While the roses were a big deal to me, he wouldn't have been very impressed by them. And while spending time together is nice for me, it means much more to him. We both seem to need to be affirmed.

We actually keep our results on the refrigerator door. It's a good way to be reminded of what we need to do to make each other the happiest. When you love someone, it's really helpful to know how to love them, and doing things for Sky that I would like doesn't always work out in the end.

It's just one of a million ways to know someone better, but it's helped me a lot. I asked this question on Facebook, but I'll ask it again here: what was your score?

And no, the Love Languages people don't know I exist, so I'm not writing this for them.

13 kind comments from you:

Fran said...

We've actually never taken this but I've been wanting to! When we do take it, I'll let you know :)

ginanorma said...

SUCH a great book, we read it years ago, and indeed very important to help us learn how to love one another! What's tricky is when our spouses, like for instance my husband prefers giving a certain type of love that isn't his love language or mine. But a way that he likes to give it...it's like a whole new dimension, know what I mean?! haha He might like giving that type of love but I don't like getting it and it's not his either. Wow i am really rambling!
Thanks for sharing with us, scores are so so interesting, and I liked your Valentine post too!!!

Sue said...

Ours were completely opposite too... I wonder if opposites attract in love languages? :)
Mine:
3 Words of Affirmation
9 Quality Time
7 Receiving Gifts
8 Acts of Service
3 Physical Touch
Aaron's:
8 Words of Affirmation
5 Quality Time
3 Receiving Gifts
4 Acts of Service
10 Physical Touch

beka said...

hahah, i love your disclaimer. :)
gosh. that test thing is awesome. eeeveryone should take it!

Ashley said...

His:
8 Words of Affirmation
7 Quality Time
0 Receiving Gifts
4 Acts of Service
11 Physical Touch
Mine:
8 Words of Affirmation
5 Quality Time
2 Receiving Gifts
4 Acts of Service
11 Physical Touch

We have veryyyyy similar scores. (It's one of the reason's that I attribute to falling in love so quickly since we both show affection the same and receive it accordingly.

Kaylee said...

The Love Languages is SUCH a great thing to do as a couple - it can really open your eyes as to what your spouse/SO needs from you...and sometimes it's not at all what you would have expected :) We haven't done ours in awhile, so maybe it's time to check-in with them. Max is definitely about physical touch (aren't a lot of guys?!!?) and quality time (although his can be just sitting together, watching a movie, or having me out in the garage while he works on something). Mine are words of affirmation and acts of service. Gosh, we need to do it again though...just to see how things have changed over the last few years!!!

Lydia said...

My husband and I did this over a year ago, and we actually found that our results were very similar . . . if not almost exactly the same. Although, I just did the test again and discovered that my two main ones have changed. I'm curious if my husband's have too. Mine used to be Quality Time and Physical Touch, but now they're Words of Affirmation and Quality Time. My husband's used to be Quality Time and Physical Touch; I'm pretty sure they're still the same based on his responses to different things.

My current scores:
10-Words of Affirmation
10-Quality Time
2-Receiving Gifts
1-Acts of Service
7-Physical Touch

Mel said...

This is one of my favorite books, ever.

I am high on words of affirmation and acts of service. Al is high on quality time and physical touch. I don't know our exact numbers, but we are both sort of extremists in that sense. Ha ha. It's definitely been a struggle to overcome that very obvious difference in our love styles.

annoyed army wife said...

We lucked out; I have no idea what the exact scores were but OccDoc and I scored the same on our two highest languages: Quality Time & Physical Touch. We thought it would change after deployment, but we've had the same scores for years now. I guess we're both just set in our ways. ;)

Chantal said...

I couldn't tell you my score (my book is all packed up!), but mine was by far Physical Touch. It doesn't surprise me, if he rubs my back I feel so great! His was a tie between Physical Touch and Quality Time. Again, doesn't surprise me.

Amanda said...

I have the Love Languages for Children Book. Not sure if the same translates to adults. It has really helped us understand our boys though. I tried to get my husband to look at it, but at the time he wasn't a very willing participant. That was a few years ago. He might be more open to it now.

Allie said...

Geeze, I am apparently all about the physical...

Love Language Scores:
5 Words of Affirmation
8 Quality Time
2 Receiving Gifts
4 Acts of Service
11 Physical Touch

Becky said...

I loved this as well, did a series of post about it on my blog.

Mine have changed over time as well, I used to be strictly Words of Affirmation, but I'm just as much Physical Touch these days.

His:
4 Words of Affirmation
5 Quality Time
4 Receiving Gifts
7 Acts of Service
10 Physical Touch

Mine:
10 Words of Affirmation
7 Quality Time
0 Receiving Gifts
3 Acts of Service
10 Physical Touch

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