Step Back and Breathe

Courtney is a blogger who I found and exhaled, thinking, "Yes. This is what I've wanted to read. This is what my heart needs." I hang on her every word, and not just for the breathtaking writing, but for the sheer beauty and comfort she brings to every post. Bloggers who have the true gift of writing are few, but Courtney not only possess that, but a sweet, kind heart. I consider her a dear friend, and I am so very honored to have her here today.

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hi friends. this is courtney from vintch. i am so happy to write in erika’s lovely space while she takes a few moments for herself. don’t you just love this girl?

i applaud her effort to take a step back and just. breathe.

as a serial stresser and worrywart, i have come to realize: there are few things in this world that can’t wait while you go get a cup of coffee and make straight your ragged, jagged thoughts.

most nights i don’t sit down with robert on the couch until at least ten thirty. until laundry has been sorted, the dog has been fed, e-mails have been read, and the next day’s outfit has been chosen. by that blessed hour of night i am officially exhausted and all i really want to do is sit in the little nook of the armrest and drift off to sleep watching the bachelorette. it’s not conducive to conversation. to growth. to a relationship.

there’s a time to do it all. there are mornings when the coffee hits you hard, so you hit the pavement hard. you push through the deadlines and the rude people and the incessantly ringing phones and just make stuff happen.

but then you usually crash by noon, sleeping in the back seat of your car in the parking lot on your lunch break, driving home ill as a hornet and falling into bed before eight p.m.

wait, just me? ok.

there’s something to be said about a slow morning. about wrapping your hands around a warm mug of coffee and just looking at the sky, watching it change from ebony to amber to teal. or a long night. with just you and a gossip magazine and a hot bath and a slinky robe for no one to see but you.

we women take on so many roles and play so many characters that to just be us, in our skin, in the living room at eight in the evening with a cup of tea, is a rare, fine luxury.

kudos to women like erika who take it.

because when we love on ourselves, and take time to remember who we are—as whole, complete persons, we find ourselves much better equipped to love on those who are there when we fall apart. who see us at our best and worst and still call us family just the same.

and because this life is crazy and exhausting and hard. but oh so deliciously worth it.