You know that feeling of being in a crowd but feeling utterly alone? That's what is happening. I feel the same hurt I've felt for the last few months, but tonight, it's an fiery hurt. I feel totally raw.
I've been thinking back to this post- the one where I decided I needed to fully give my heart away, the one where I decided to trust. Silly, silly girl. I'm sure someone somewhere would say it was necessary. It'll teach me something. Maybe, even, that it was worth it, because I have my daughter.
But tonight, I'm not able to swallow any of those things. A quote I like from Anais Nin goes: "I am only responsible for my own heart. You offered yours up for the smashing my darling. Only a fool would give out such a vital organ."
I feel so incredibly foolish.
3 kind comments from you:
Ohmyword, that Anais Nin quote is amazing.
Spot on.
I'm sorry you're in a raw time, darling.
Sometimes it sucks to hear people say the sun's going to rise again tomorrow...
You just want to forget the mistakes you've made. :\
(Sigh.)
There is hope.
Hang in there sweetie. It's ok to let yourself feel the hurt. Sometimes you have to before you heal.
This is not the end of the story.
I am so sorry for your hurt and pain. I can only say that I know how you feel. I felt like a robot, just going through the motions when my life fell apart. Just have faith that you'll rebuild something better.
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